Pairing Today
"For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation." Rainer Marie Rilke
Pairing - the method
“What men and women seek from love today is no longer a romantic luxury; it is an essential of emotional survival. Less and less it is a hunt for the excitement of infatuation, or for the doubtful security of the marriage nest. More and more it is the hope of finding in intimate love something of personal validity, personal relevance, a confirmation of one’s existence. Whatever the forms and institutions, the essential problems of intimate love can be solved only through relationships that are open, acute, and authentic.”
Pairing—How to Achieve Genuine Intimacy by Dr George R Bach and Ronald M Deutsch
Lonely - or - Safe & Sound, Sue Johnson
“We are bonding mammals.... We can turn our relationships around, and we can find a way to the safe and sound that we all long for.”
“A human being longs for, is wired for, connection with others. Our nature is to bond intimately with a precious few, but then, having learned the lessons of belonging, to connect with others, our friends, colleagues, our tribe. When we are at our best, we offer support and caring to others because we recognize that they are just like us, human and vulnerable. Forming a deep mutual bond with another is the first imperative of the human species.”
Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships
Foreigner I Want to Know What Love Is
THE Great Question--Your Life Answers IT
"In my life there’s been heartache and pain, I don’t know if I can face it again, I can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far, To change this lonely life, I want to know what love is”